You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
