It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Even my vagina gasped.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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