You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
