just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize