Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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