too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize