At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
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