even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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