In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
