I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
She bit a glass in half.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
