Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
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