Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
