Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
