she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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