So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
