I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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