don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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