I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize