Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
