That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
