Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize