So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
