i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize