yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Swine flu. Run for my life!
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
