we're blogging at a bar
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
You left your phone here
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