yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize