I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I think i got beer on your cat.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
