somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
