So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize