Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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