Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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