omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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