hell yes lets make some ravioli
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
