so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize