Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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