Betty ford says i'm here all night
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
