omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
