White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
