can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize