Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize