I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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