he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize