508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
