he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
