You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
