): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
The adults are the big ones right?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize