my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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