using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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