it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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