The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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