Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize